Date: December 23, 1970
Vocals: The Ladybirds
Producer: John Robins
Director: John Robins
Writer: Benny Hill
- A Tribute to the Lower Tidmarsh Fire Brigade
- Opportunity's Knocking
- Ernie - The Fastest Milkman In The West
- Nicholas Parsons - "Now, if I came to you and said I had a month to holiday and only seven pounds to spend, could you tell me where to go?"
Fred Scuttle - "Yes sir, but I would not be so rude."
- Dickie Dido - "Now, Pythagoras had a theorum.... and it hurt!"
- Huey Crane - "I've never used buttons. There's no flies on me."
- The opening sketch features Sue Bond in Rubber Balloons; this was her first appearance in the series.
- This is the first of three black and white programs that were produced as a result of a wage dispute at Thames TV.
- The first string of Quickies features more examples of Look Number Seven
- Dickie Dido last appeared in a sketch with Patricia Hayes in 1970.
- The second string of Quickies feature:
- A bungled robbery by a trio of thieves (Nicholas Parsons, Benny and Trisha Noble)
- Sign hangers (Benny and Jackie Wright) foiled by a bicyclist (Bob Todd)
- A singer (Trisha Noble) flying off a swing
- Splash detergent erasing the pattern off a floor (with Benny and Jan Butlin)
- A dancer (Benny) sailing past his back-up dancers (Lesley Goldie and Kay Frazer
- A TV host (Benny) reveals the hidden word in a Theatre Royal poster
- A TV cook (Benny) breaking a bowl with a soup can
- A dancer (Benny) loses his partner (Kay Frazer) and finds a studio employee (Nicholas Parsons) (The singer is Trisha Noble)
- A lack of difference between Fair Deal Ben and the competing detergent (Benny does the voice)
- "A Tribute to the Lower Tidmarsh Fire Brigade' was later remade in A Tribute to the Lower Tidmarsh Fire Brigade.
- Benny does a parody of the British talent show "Opportunity's Knocking." He also parodied it with a German version called "Opportunite Knokkes" in 1971.
- Benny performs his song, Ernie - The Fastest Milkman In The West which includes the lyrics "Ernie was only 68. He didn't want to die." Ironically, Benny passed away at the age of 68.
- Bob Todd doesn't appear in this episode.
- In the closing tag, Sue Bond can be seen laughing as she chases after Benny around and through (possibly) the Teddington Studios parking lot.